I feel so good right now. I probably need a shower but I feel good. I just got back from the free workshop that Kitiera gave at the studio she will be teaching weekly classes at here in town. It was good and when she reminded us to be in our bodies I realized that I already was. That was a rare occurrence indeed. I can't really explain how synchronistict his is for me to have her teaching here. This studio is literally two minutes from my house, I could walk there. There is no sitting in traffic for five million hours and being pretty much useless already by the time I walk in the classroom.
That's a big issue for me you know, the driving. I hate the driving. I can do it, as long as Cyd comes with me (so far someday I'll fix that too), but oh my god my body is in pieces by the time I get there. Every inch of me is wound up so tight I feel like I'm going to break. That doesn't make for a successful dance class half the time. I'm already emotionally exhausted and panicky. Not that it isn't worth it, because once I get there it fully is. The problem is making myself get there. So I think for now I'm going to enjoy what's being offered to me for a while.
I'm going to try my best to reside in my body. I'm going to feel joy even when I make mistakes, and oh there are plenty of mistakes. It is called a class for a reason. I still can't get a combo or choreography to save my life. I think that part of my brain is missing. I will still try. I haven't felt this excited and empowered to dance in a long time. Blessed I tell you.